‘Thank You For Understanding’: How To Stop People Pleasing This Holiday Season

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The holidays are supposed to be a time for unwinding, reconnecting with loved ones, reflecting on the year and generally relaxing, joyous activities. They’re supposed to be – but that doesn’t mean that they always are. If you struggle to get in the holiday spirit, you’re not alone. Sleep research company Sleepopolis conducted a survey on what keeps people up at night this time of year. It found that 66 percent of respondents feel more stressed out around the holidays.

The reality is that, life doesn’t slow down around the holidays. If anything, it gets busier. We’re expected to handle regular workloads on compressed timelines, all while attending holiday parties, traveling to visit family, gift shopping and more. That can make this time of year particularly stressful for people pleasers, whose attention and energy is being pulled in more directions than usual. If you know you’re a people pleaser, it’s especially important to be aware of your energy levels and to enforce boundaries around the holidays. Otherwise, you could enter the New Year feeling burnt out rather than refreshed. Here are people-pleasing habits to avoid during the holidays.

Traveling Too Much

If you have friends or family living in different parts of the country (or the world), then you could easily find yourself jet-setting during the holidays to make everyone happy. If you have divorced parents who now live in different places, this can become a major stressor on your life. Everybody feels entitled to your time. Everyone claims they “need to see you” for the holidays. Suddenly, you have six flights booked. It’s not only incredibly demanding on your time and energy, but also your finances. Plus, holiday travel is stressful. According to a poll conducted by OnePoll on behalf of SpotHero and reported on SWNSDigital, people face an average of eight stressful moments during holiday travel. And that’s just for one trip, so if you’re taking several to make people happy, you’re welcoming a tremendous amount of stress.